I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
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