another moral hangover. fuck.
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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