i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Randomize
