Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
Randomize
