i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Randomize
