No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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