I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
