If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
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