hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
