You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
