grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
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