Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
