we're blogging at a bar
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
Randomize
