I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Randomize
