Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
