you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
There was a lot of him and a little penis
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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