You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
He told me they were just razor bumps!
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Randomize
