I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize
