He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I want you more than these girls want KFC
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
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