is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
