I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
