um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Dude, I just masturbated with my cat sleeping on my boobs....
You have GOT to get this crazy cat lady thing under control. I'm finding you a man. And you'll take him, and thank me. After that text, you have no right to be picky.
Randomize
