Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
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