It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
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