Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
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