no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Randomize
