I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Randomize
