i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
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