Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize