I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
My vagina is very pro this idea
Randomize
