Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
