White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
