I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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