Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
