just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
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