She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Randomize
