Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize