Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
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