i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
