i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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