i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
