why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
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