You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
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