Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
