I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Randomize