Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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