I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
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