Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize
