hotel room ftw
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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