I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
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